


The Spaces That Divide Us

by robinrunsfiction



Series: Weapons of Clairvoyance [2]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: F/M, Kidnapping, Non-Graphic Violence, Part 2, Sequel, Some Fluff, Some angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-09 13:14:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19476646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robinrunsfiction/pseuds/robinrunsfiction
Summary: The direct follow-up to Weapons of Clairvoyance. Gerard, (YN), and the gang head south to investigate reports of brainwashing at a private school for troubled boys.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: Nothing At All by Taking Back Sunday and Young and Menace by Fall Out Boy (~ denotes song change)

When you pulled up in front of the house, there was a light on in the living room despite the late hour. Gerard opened the door for you, the living room filling with crisp fall air as Mikey jumped up from his place on the couch as you walked in.

“Where the hell have you been?” he shouted before noticing how you were both dressed, looking back at the breaking news on the TV. “You did that didn’t you?”

“Mikey, listen,” Gerard started.

“You killed them! And you tricked them into shooting that Bob guy, Frank told us!”

“Would you shut up and let us explain?” Gerard shouted back. You didn’t know what to do or say, standing silently behind Gerard, wrapping his jacket tighter around yourself. Mikey’s mouth formed a tight line and his brow was furrowed, but he nodded and sat back down. Gerard began to explain your plan to draw Restoricom off the rest of them by taking off that night, how Brendon found you, and it was either following his plan, or continuing to run from Restoricom. He left out all mention of Sarah.

After hearing everything, Mikey nodded and sighed. “I’m sorry I blew up, I was worried. I didn’t know if I was gonna see you, either of you, again.”

“We couldn’t risk anyone else knowing,” you said quietly. “It could have compromised everything.”

“So, it’s over?”

Gerard nodded silently, and Mikey got up. “I haven’t slept in a week thanks to you two, so I’m going to bed. Welcome back.”

You sat down where Mikey had been sitting and let out a sigh. “We aren’t evil, right?”

“No Sugar, all we did was help Sarah do her job, and saved ourselves from being killed for what we are.”

You nodded listening to Gerard’s reassurance. He was right, you knew he was, but it was going to take time for it to sink in.

“Come on, let’s go to bed,” he said offering you his hand. You took it, following him up the stairs to the comfort of his familiar bed.

~

The next morning Gerard woke up, squinting his eyes against the sun that was beginning to shine through the crack of the curtains.

He instinctively reached out for you but felt nothing but the cold spot where you had lay the night before. He sat up and saw your phone was gone as well. He tried to regain his bearings as he looked around his room. The gown you wore the night before was draped carefully over his desk chair, your pajamas in a pile at the foot of the bed. Your bag in the corner looked like it had been dug through, but it didn’t look like you had left with no intentions of returning.

Gerard felt another wave of guilt wash over him. He had come to learn that when you had a lot on your mind, you isolated yourself and he knew you were dealing with your own feelings of guilt over last night’s events. It was his fault that you were dragged into this whole mess. He jumped into a plan without considering other options and the next thing you knew you were doing a favor for Death and the blood of a dozen corrupt men was on your hands. Gerard felt like he needed to make this right somehow.

He got up and decided to go check by the lake to see if that’s where you were. He expected to find the coffee maker running when he entered the kitchen, but he found it was still empty and cold.

“Hey Gee, where’s the car?” Mikey asked, his voice still thick with sleep as he shuffled into the kitchen.

“(YN), she must hav-” Gerard started, but was cut off by his phone buzzing in his pocket. “(YN) are you ok? Where are you?”

Mikey watched his brother’s face turned from concern, to shock, to sadness.

“Are you ok?” He paused, listening. “Ok, I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“What’s wrong?” Mikey asked as Gerard ended the call and started rushing toward the door, grabbing his jacket.

“(YN)’s house was burned down the night before last, and the investigators are all over her. It’s got to have been Restoricom. I’m gonna go be with her.”

Mikey nodded, his head still spinning at the news since he still wasn’t completely awake. He watched as Gerard went out the front door and gracefully transformed into a crow and took off into the sky.

~

You were sitting on the curb staring at the ground, the smell of burnt wood hung in the air. Last night as you got ready for bed, you realized that in the commotion of the last few days, you phone battery had died. You plugged it in but left it off, not having the mental energy to look at it.

But once you were in bed, you couldn’t stay asleep, afraid if you closed your eyes of what you would see, whether it would be memories of what you had done, or what might lay ahead of you and you weren’t sure which scared you more. Before dawn, you decided to give up and pulled yourself out of bed. You turned on your phone and wandered downstairs as it started up.

Dozens of text message and voicemail notifications started to load and your heart began to race. You went to the text messages first, all from your landlord.

> (YN), its Kenny, the police just called to report a fire at your place, are you ok?
> 
> (YN) I’m heading over to your house, I hope you’re ok!
> 
> (YN) you aren’t answering, I hope you are just busy, call me back as soon as possible!
> 
> (YN) investigators need to talk to you, get over here ASAP
> 
> (YN) your boss said you quit weeks ago with no notice, what the fuck is going on?!

You felt sick to your stomach as you listened to the voicemails from the police and your landlord. You had to get back there and deal with the wreckage. You raced back upstairs, changed clothes and grabbed Gerard’s car keys. You’d call once he was up.

Now you heard footsteps running up to you. “Hey Gerard,” you said without looking up.

“Are you ok Sugar?” he asked sitting down on the curb next to you.

“Yea, no, I don’t know,” you replied, tears stinging your eyes. “Everything I had that wasn’t at your place is gone. My car is destroyed, photos, heirlooms, everything,” you sniffled. Gerard wrapped his arm around you protectively and you rested your head against his shoulder and let all the tears fall. Gerard looked back over his shoulder at the smoldering remains, it was a total loss.

“Excuse me sir, are you Mr.. Gerard Way?”

“Yea, is there something I can do?” he asked looking up at the police officer. You felt a wave of panic wash over you, as you hadn’t gotten the chance to fill Gerard in on the story you had told them regarding your whereabouts.

“Where have you and Miss (YLN) been the last few days?”

“Up at his cabin, my phone died, and I forgot my charger! God, I already told you!” you jumped in before Gerard had a chance to respond.

“Miss (YLN),” the officer growled, frustrated that your outburst had just compromised his line of questioning. You burst out into hysterical sobs, throwing your face dramatically against Gerard’s shoulder.

“Officer, you cannot expect someone in her emotional state to be questioned like this,” Gerard said, knowing full well you were putting on a show.

“Is there anyone who can corroborate your whereabouts?”

“My brother, Mikey. I can give you his number. In the meantime, is it ok if I walk to the café around the corner and grab her a coffee?”

“Leave your phone,” the officer said. Gerard got up and pulled out his phone and gave the officer Mikey’s number.

“I’ll be right back Sugar,” he said pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You watched as he jogged around the corner and suddenly a falcon flew over, heading out of town rapidly.

You had let your sobs die down so you could overhear what the officer was saying on the phone. He had to leave a message because, just as Gerard suspected, his brother wouldn’t pick up for a number he didn’t recognize. A few minutes later Mikey called back. You could hear the officer ask him the same question that he posed to Gerard about your whereabouts.

“And where do you live sir? Oh, that far out of town. Ok, fair enough.”

A few minutes later Gerard reappeared, two coffees in hand. The officer came back and gave Gerard his phone.

“We reached your brother; he corroborated your account. You’re both free to go, we will be in touch when we find out more.”

You and Gerard made your way back to his car silently. The sun was fully up, and he could see just how tired you were, the darkest circles he’d ever seen under your eyes. You handed him back his keys and got in the passenger side.

“Sorry for stealing your car,” you said quietly.

“Its fine. Whatever you need, don’t ever hesitate to take,” he smiled wearily as he started the car. “Are you ok? Really?”

“I’m drained, but also kinda relieved. Like, it really, really feels over now. That whole chapter of my life is done,” you said taking a swing of your coffee then looked over at Gerard. “Thank you.”

He glanced back. “For what?”

“For helping me, for keeping me safe, for believing in me all along.”

Gerard smiled; weight lifted off his own heart a little hearing those words. “You don’t blame me for this?”

You scoffed. “Not for one second. You didn’t give me this ability. You didn’t create that division of Restoricom. You’re my light in all this.”

Words danced on the tip of his tongue, but he swallowed them back, instead reaching over and grabbing your hand as he drove home

“I was thinking I might throw a Halloween party,” Gerard replied after a while, breaking the silence.

You perked up. “Oh my God, is it really almost Halloween?”

“Yea, you don’t mind, do you?”

“Not at all, is my favorite,” you replied with a grin, your mood decidedly improved. This was exactly what you needed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: Baby You’re A Haunted House - Gerard Way and What I’ve Done - Linkin Park

On Halloween the house was full of people you recognized, but more you hadn’t met before. As you made your way through the crowd, you spotted Gerard talking to Nicole, who was dressed as a unicorn. As you approached, Nicole stopped what she was saying to see what had pulled Gerard’s attention so completely.

“Well I guess I’ll be going,” she smirked as she rolled her eyes and abandoned the conversation to find another drink and you couldn’t help but grin at the reaction.

“You look amazing, Sugar,” Gerard said, totally enamored. He really wanted to go as a vampire and you were more than excited to play his victim, especially since one of the items of clothing you inexplicably grabbed from your home was your black lace dress. You took your time doing your hair and applied smoky eye makeup and two bloody puncture wounds to your neck to finish off the outfit.

“Thanks, this whole look,” you said waving your hands in front of him in awe, “really, really suits you.” Gerard was wearing very well-fitting jeans, a button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and a black vest over it. He had made himself almost iridescently pale, eyeliner smudged perfectly around his eyes, his smile highlighted two dangerously sharp fangs, and his hair was black was a little longer again since you had mentioned that was your favorite look on him.

Gerard laughed at your reaction. “Hey, can we go outside for a minute to talk?” he asked, suddenly seeming nervous. You nodded, but when he looked up his face turned to a look of surprise. “Is that Adam? I thought he went back down to North Carolina.”

You turned as he waved before coming over. He already stuck out amongst the crowd due to his height, but even more since he wasn’t wearing a costume and seemed concerned.

“Hey, what’s going on? We would have invited you if we knew you were in town,” Gerard said warmly.

“I didn’t realize it was Halloween. Can I talk to you?” He replied; his tone serious.

“Sure, come on,” Gerard said leading him toward the study. You went to the kitchen to get a drink.  
Time flew by as you got pulled into a lively discussion and the next thing you knew, Gerard was back by your side.

“Hey, now we really need to talk.”

“Sure,” you said following him outside.

“Adam came back to see if we could help him with a possible situation down in North Carolina.”

Your heart started racing. “Is it Restoicom again?”

“No, he said when he got back, a friend had told him about this school where he had sent his son because he was having issues in a regular school. Now it’s been a few months and he isn’t communicating as much, and when it does, he sounds strange, not like himself. Then they started to hear these rumors that the boys are being brainwashed. Adam wants some help getting access to the campus and see where things go from there.”

“I’m in,” you replied almost immediately. “As long as you promise me one thing.”

"Anything.”

"We don’t go into any of this half-cocked. No unnecessary risks because I can’t take the guilt of any of you guys getting hurt, and as uncomfortable as kids make me, I don’t want anything to happen to them either.”

Gerard nodded. “Agreed.”

“So, when do we head south?“

~

You sat up with a jolt, a cold sweat on your face. You glanced over at Gerard, sleeping undisturbed. You were very familiar with what were visions, and what were just dreams. What you just saw was a vision, and as much as it freaked you out, you grabbed your notebook from under your pillow to record it.

‘Me & Gerard with a kid? Yikes. Not much else w/this vision’ You closed the book and laid back down, trying to get back to sleep, hoping some further explanation would come, but the next morning you woke up peacefully with nothing further coming to mind.

That afternoon everyone assembled in the living room. Andy had gone back to his animal rights group and was going to start applying for veterinary schools now that he knew he was no longer being followed, so he would not be accompanying your team. When Nicole was asked the night before if she was interested in coming along, she declined the invitation, as she had her fill of using her powers for a while. Adam had returned to North Carolina earlier in the morning. Ray had basically refused to be alone since he was kidnapped and was excited to get a change of scenery.

You were worried about the trip with Frank, as he still seemed uneasy around you since the night at Restoricom. You couldn’t blame him though, you sometimes felt uneasy around yourself.

"So how are we gonna get into a private boarding school? None of us are teachers, we aren’t kids, and we don’t know any kids,” Frank pointed out as everyone settled in.

That’s when your vision popped back into your mind. “Mikey! It was you!”

“What was me?”

“I had a vision of me and Gerard with a kid, it must have been you! If you can turn into an insect, you can turn into a troubled youth, right?”

“You mean he isn’t already?” Ray laughed. Mikey glared at him.

“That could work, plus if shit goes sideways, you can always escape easily,” Gerard said thoughtfully.

“Why do I always have to be the one who goes in?” Mikey whined.

“Because you’re my brother,” Gerard grinned.

“Besides, do you want to act like you’re married to me?” You asked with a laugh. Mikey considered it for a moment and shrugged. You laughed even harder as Gerard shot a glare at Mikey.

“But if they’re brainwashing the kids, what if they brainwash Mikey?” Frank snapped. The anger in his voice was clear.

“Maybe if we realize we’ve lost contact you could go in and pull him out?” You suggested.

“Why don’t you ever go in? Why are you always throwing everyone else to the wolves with your visions and plans?” Frank said getting up and storming out the front door, slamming the door behind him.

“Hey!” Gerard shouted after him. When Frank didn’t come back, he followed him out the door as you sat in stunned silence with Ray and Mikey.

“I’m sorry Mikey, I didn’t mean to force you into anything,” you apologized, staring at the floor.

“No, I understand, you’re just going by what you’re seeing.”

“Maybe I should stay back. Take John with you on the trip, him and Adam are close,” you suggested, getting up.

”(YN), don’t worry about Frank,“ Ray reassured, but you just shrugged.

Meanwhile on the front porch, Gerard watched his friend light up a cigarette. "What the fuck was that about?”

Frank took a long drag and let it out. “She’s a killer, man. It took her no time at all to turn on Bob. What if she decides she needs to turn on us?”

“I fucking told you that he was a spy and you know that’s true because you didn’t see them coming after me when they thought I was him. Me and (YN) decided before we even left that he would be expendable if it came down to us or him,” Gerard spat back. “If you got a problem with that take it up with me. I made the decisions, and if I decide she isn’t going in on a mission, then that’s my fucking call.”

Frank threw his cigarette butt to the ground and stepped on it; eyes trained on what he was doing. He walked back across the distance of the porch to Gerard. “You believe in her visions? Fine. But you better not be blinded by some pretty face. I’m not gonna forget what I saw that night and I don’t think you should forget it either,” He walked back to the door to the house. "She is a killer,” he said putting emphasis on each word.

"Don’t you dare make her feel any more guilty than she already does,” Gerard replied through his clenched jaw.

“Too late,” you said from the open doorway, pushing past both men.

Frank didn’t say anything more before walking inside, leaving Gerard staring after you as you hurried up the driveway.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: Take On The World - You Me At Six

You walked up the road for a while, not really sure where you were going, you just needed time out of the house and away from everyone.

“Fucking asshole,” you muttered under your breath as the sky darkened above you. You didn’t care about the weather, or anything at the moment. Soon you spotted something of a trail leading into the woods. You stepped off the road and started climbing through the brush. You didn’t know where you were going, but at the same time knew you were on the right path.

Eventually you found yourself at a small stream. As you watched the water flow, you realized that this stream fed into the lake behind Gerard’s house and you could follow it back if you wanted to, but you didn’t want to, not yet. You wanted to just take in the quiet of the forest, the cold air, the smell of rain in the distance, and the fact you were no where near anyone who thought less of you for what you had to do in an hour of desperation. What you did to save everyone else.

You found a tree to lean against while you sat on the cool, damp ground. Taking a deep breath, you felt yourself relax a little, pushing Frank’s words from your mind.

“Where did (YN) go?” Ray asked, after Gerard came back inside.

“I don’t know, she’s the damn seer,” Gerard growled, trying to keep his anger at Frank, who had retreated upstairs, in check. Gerard sat down and held his head in his hands. “I wish I had her power, so then if anyone had a problem with what we do they could take it up with me.”

Ray nodded silently and Mikey got up to talk to Frank upstairs. As time pressed on, Gerard continued to stand watch at the window, waiting for you to return. As the November sky grew darker, he started to get worried.

“I’m gonna go look for her, I know she needs time alone to cool off, but this is too long,” Gerard said, trying to keep the anxious tone in his voice hidden. Ray again nodded silently as Gerard hurried out the door.

~

_You were in a dark room, suddenly a screen lit up in front of you. You were tied to a chair and you struggled against your bindings as you heard footsteps approach from behind._

You opened your eyes in a daze, head buzzing, face wet from the cold rain that was coming down. There was more to that vision, it had to be a vision, because it didn’t feel like a dream and you knew the difference. You cursed the rain under your breath as you slowly remembered where you were outside to begin with.

“Hey,” Gerard said, causing you to jump as you didn’t notice him approaching. “You’re gonna freeze out here in the rain.“

You couldn’t be bothered to let out more than a grumble as he took off his jacket and put it around your shoulders.

“Don’t let Frank get to you Sugar, he’ll see eventually that he’s wrong.”

“What if he’s right though? What if you shouldn’t trust me and I’m leading us all astray and I’m just too dumb to realize?”

“Hey! No, God no, do not say that! You are so smart and clever!” Gerard said quickly taking one of your cold hands in his warm one, the other tilting your chin up to look him in the eyes. “(YN), remember what she told you, trust me, and know that I trust you, you haven’t been wrong yet.”

“That’s what scares me,” you sighed.

“What did you see?” Gerard asked, concern etched across his face.

“I don’t know, the rain just woke me up. It wasn’t done, but I woke up, it was so weird,” you replied confused. You squeezed your eyes shut, willing them to see something more. Gerard gathered you in his arms and you rested your head against his shoulder.

“Whatever comes, we’ll get through this together, we always will. I love you so much, (YN),” he murmured.

You pulled back and looked into his hazel eyes. The eyes that haunted you from before you even met that day in your front yard. Your heart raced in your chest.

“I wanted to tell you on Halloween, since it’s your favorite day, but I didn’t get the chance. I’m sorry for everything I’ve dragged you into-”

You cut him off by pressing your lips to his. “Don’t apologize. I’d rather go on all the dangerous, crazy missions with you than spend a second back in my old, safe, boring life,” you said when you pulled back. “I love you too, Gerard.”

~

When you made it back to the house, Frank had returned downstairs after a long talk with Mikey. He still was glaring daggers at you, but you were shining from the moment you had shared in the woods with Gerard.

“Ok, now let’s finish this plan so we can start packing and head south,” Gerard started. “Mikey, are you still ok with posing as a kid and going in the school?”

“Yea, no problem,” Mikey replied.

“Ok, then (YN) and I will pose as your parents. We’ll have to get some school records created documenting your troubles in school and get an appointment with the academy. My guess is if they’re trying to brainwash kids, there won’t be any problem getting you in there,” Gerard concluded. “Frank are you coming? I’m sure we could use you.”

Frank sat back in his chair and looked down. “Yea, I’m coming.”

“Thank you,” Gerard said looking at his friend, knowing that there was a truce being reached between them.

“What if we reached out to Pete to create a website and records and stuff?” you suggested.

“Good idea, Sugar,” Gerard replied. With that, everyone set to work packing for the trip and the next adventure.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: All Ready To Go - Taking Back Sunday, Bet on You - The Man Who, Afterglow - All Time Low

“Welcome to my humble abode,” Adam said as everyone piled out of the car after the long day of driving. “There isn’t a ton of space, but its cozy. I have two guest beds in one room, the couch, and an air mattress in the basement.”

“How do we wanna decide who gets what bed? Draw straws?” Ray asked.

“(YN) should get a bed,” Gerard said.

“No,” you said quickly. You didn’t want it to seem like you were getting any special treatment because Gerard was your boyfriend. You didn’t want to cause any more undue tension. “You know I can sleep anywhere. You guys fight it out.”

“The air mattress downstairs can sleep two, and there’s another bathroom in the basement” Adam piped up.

“Honestly that sounds like a good deal,” you replied as you looked at Gerard with eyebrows raised.

“Ok, you guys fight it out over the couch, we’ll take the air mattress,” Gerard said to the others, taking your bags and following Adam downstairs.

“The first clue that this would be less of a romantic getaway than I was expecting should have been the lack of a door at the top of the stairs,” you commented with a laugh as you saw the half -finished basement. The walls and floor were just the bare cement, but colorful throw rugs covered the cold ground and a floor lamp cast the space in a warm glow. There was an old TV set up in the corner, the air mattress was made up and sitting in the middle of the room between a couple well-worn easy chairs, and a dartboard hanging from the exposed rafters.

“Sorry,” Adam commented, his head almost grazing the low ceiling. “But it could be worse, could be dirt floors.”

“Its fine, I’m just kidding,” you said with a smile.

“So, you guys got that meeting tomorrow?” Adam asked.

“Yea, we have to finish going over our story, make sure we don’t have any gaps. Pete forwarded me copies of all the documents he prepared so we should study them in case he asks about any of the incidents that supposedly lead Mikey to getting kicked out of school. He said he even exchanged a few emails with this Mr.. Grammar about Mikey’s behavior,” Gerard explained.

“Wow, thanks Pete,” you said. Pete had been excited about the prospect of tearing down another institution, but you were thrilled he was willing to go this far.

“Alright, I’ll let you guys get at it. I told my friend Shawn that you’re here to help and he really appreciates it,” Adam said before heading upstairs.

~

After about an hour of ironing out all the final details of your story with Mikey and Gerard, you were flipping through a magazine, not sure what to do with yourself in Adam’s home.

“Hey (YN),” Gerard started.

“Hmm?” You replied looking up.

“I, um, realized that we’ve never even been on a real date, and I was wondering if you’d like to go out tonight?”

You laughed with amusement at the nervousness that crept into his voice. “Of course! Wow, we really are doing so much of this relationship backwards, huh? I mean we kissed the night we met after you were watching me for days. Then we ran away together, took down a multinational pharmaceutical corporation, were accessory to murder, confessed our love, and now we’re going on a date.”

Gerard laughed as well before crossing the room to you and cupping your cheek in his hand. “I love our weird, backward life and I love you,” he said before placing a soft kiss to your lips. You sighed happily as he pulled back. “Be ready in 10 minutes,” he said with a smirk as he went upstairs.

You quickly changed into one of the nicer shirts you brought along, straightened up your hair, and put on a little make up. Suddenly you were nervous. You couldn’t remember the last time you were on a proper date, and even though you already loved Gerard with everything you had, you couldn’t help but worry that you might mess something up.

You went upstairs and found him waiting by the front door. “Ready, Sugar?”

“Let’s go,” you replied with a smile. Gerard opened the door for you as you headed out.

“Adam recommended a diner up the road, sound good?”

“Definitely,” you responded. Gerard reached over and took your hand and you looked over at him and smiled.

When you arrived at the diner, you grabbed a booth in the corner, away from anyone else so no one could overhear your conversation. The waitress came over to take your orders, but you noticed that she was looking at both of you curiously.

“You aren’t from around here, are you?” She asked after taking your orders.

“Uh, no, just visiting a friend,” Gerard replied, shooting you a look.

The waitress nodded and gave a tight-lipped smile before going back behind the counter.

“Small town people are always so suspicious of outsiders. We should have considered that,” you said, concerned.

“I think we’ll be ok, we aren’t that memorable.”

“At least you can change how you look, be a different person every time they look around.”

“I dunno, that sounds more memorable to me,” Gerard laughed. “But I was thinking we should come up with our backstory.”

“Isn’t it set? Mikey fell in with some rough kids at school, stopped participating in class when we tried to rein him in, and the school was sick of dealing with him, so they recommended St. Frederick’s.”

“Not that, I meant how did we meet?” Gerard said with an amused smile.

“Seriously?” you laughed. “Have you thought about it already?”

“Yea,” he laughed. “The way I imagine it, I was in this band playing a show in a small dive bar, and in the front row was the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, all by herself,” he started, and you were already blushing.

“And you were playing Bowie covers,” you added.

“Yes, and you knew the words, so when I started to sing Heroes I was singing right to you, our eyes locked and I knew I couldn’t live without you.”

“Oh my god,” you murmured, your heart doing flips at the thought.

“But then real life happened and I had to give up the band, it was a crazy idea anyway.”

“But I’ve always supported your dream, because I know it makes you happy.”

Gerard smiled at you and took your hand. “Sounds like a pretty solid story.”

“I’d buy it,” you replied as the waitress came back with your food.

~

After your meal, you headed back out to the car. The sun had long since set, but you didn’t want to head back to the crowded house just yet.

“There’s a park a couple blocks west of here, if you wanna go walk around for a while?” You suggested.

“How did you know, oh right,” Gerard laughed. “I will get used to that one day.”

The park was deserted, so you strolled hand in hand at a leisurely pace, enjoying the fact that the weather wasn’t as cold as it had been back up north.

“Was this a good first date?” Gerard asked as you sat down on a park bench illuminated by a streetlight.

“I think so, I think I’ll stick around. You seem pretty cool,” you replied casually, and Gerard laughed.

“Every time I look at you, I think I fall a little more in love with you,” he said sincerely.

You blushed and looked at your hand that was intertwined with his. “I can feel it Gerard. I can feel the love from you, and I don’t know if I can even accurately convey how I feel back, but I feel the same way. I don’t have any doubt in fate anymore, I just think about what she told me and how I feel, and I know it’s real.”

Gerard smiled at you as he gently caressed your cheek, before leaning in and pressing his lips to yours. You leaned toward him and deepened the kiss, as you ran a hand through his hair to pull him closer to you. Tongues danced together as you kissed on the park bench without a care. When you pulled back, you were both smiling contentedly.

“I think we should go back to the cabin when we get done with this,” Gerard said as you made your way back to the car. “Just you and me.”

“That sounds like heaven,” you replied.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Note: Shout out to @mrsmaria for some assistance with this chapter. I texted her and was like what would you name a school with a Fraiser type character as a headmaster and she totally came through with the reference. 
> 
> Song recommendations for this chapter: The Kids Aren’t Alright - Fall Out Boy

The next morning you were getting ready for the meeting with the headmaster. You certainly looked the part of a concerned mother you thought as you assessed your appearance in the mirror, wearing a sensible sweater and pencil skirt. Gerard joined you in the bathroom, using the mirror to adjust his tie. His hair was short, black, and neatly groomed.

“Ready?” he asked.

“I guess, I just hope I don’t slip up because I’m nervous. You know I tend to ramble.”

“Don’t worry, you’ll do fine,” he said with a reassuring smile.

You nodded in reply as Adam walked in. “Here, you can borrow these,” he said holding out two rings in his hand. “Since they’re probably gonna scrutinize every inch of you.”

Gerard took the rings from him, sliding one on his left ring finger, then he held up the diamond ring for you. You could feel your cheeks start to blush feverishly as you mentally scolded yourself for being so silly. ‘This is an act, get it together girl.’

You were about to reach for the ring when Gerard grabbed your left hand and slid the ring on your finger, trying to conceal his goofy smile.

“Thanks,” you mumbled, cheeks somehow finding a way to burn hotter.

“I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Way,” Adam proclaimed triumphantly.

You rolled your eyes, still blushing. “Who do these belong to?”

“They were my parents’ so don’t go losing them.”

You both nodded. “Is Mikey ready?” you asked.

“Let’s just go,” you heard a childlike voice mutter from down the hall.

Gerard stuck his head out the doorway and doubled over laughing. “You look just like you did when you were eight!”

“I’m glad you find this all amusing while I’m the one doing the heavy lifting here,” came the retort as Mikey walked into the bathroom. You looked on slightly horrified.

“This may be creepier than when you were me at Restoricom, and that was really creepy.”

“Trust me (YN), this isn’t any less creepy for me,” he said standing on his toes to see his reflection in the high mirror.

“Mikey, don’t talk to your mother that way,” Gerard tried to scold him, but couldn’t help but giggle.

“Seriously though, we have to be convincing,” you replied, as you slapped Gerard’s arm.

“Yes, mom,” Mikey replied.

“Ugh, but can we wait until we get to the school?”

~

After driving out of town, you arrived at St. Frederick’s. The campus was an impressively, with big brick academic buildings with smaller dormitory buildings behind it and a tall iron fence around the perimeter. Gerard drove slowly up the long, tree lined drive toward the main building.

Once parked, the three of you piled out of the car. Gerard placed his hand on the small of your back and guided you in, as Mikey followed behind. ‘He certainly has his role of obstinate kid down pat,’ you thought.

You found your way to the office and after checking in, sat silently. Mikey was fidgeting and you felt nervous. Gerard must have noticed and took your hand.

“You must be the Way family,” an older man said as he opened the door to his office. He was tall, and balding, but appeared very dignified in his mannerisms. All three of you got to your feet and Gerard led the way forward, greeting the man with a handshake. “I’m Stephen Grammar, headmaster.”

“Nice to meet you, I’m Gerard, this is my wife (YN), and this is Mikey,” he said as he pulled Mikey forward to stand in front of him. You were just happy that the attention was off you, as you could feel yourself blushing again.

“Nice to meet you all, let’s sit down and discuss what we can possibly do for this young man.”

You all followed him into his office and sat with Mikey in the chair between you and Gerard. You placed your hand on his shoulder and hoped that the nervousness that you felt was coming across as a mother concerned for her child.

“I understand Mikey here has been having some behavioral issues,” Mr. Grammar started. “Here at St. Frederick’s Academy, we are specially designed to foster a learning environment and overall structure that public schools just cannot compete with. We offer one-on-one tutoring, emotional counseling, and treatment for all manner of substance abuse, if needed.”

“How often can we come to see him? Or can he visit home?” you asked, almost instantly realizing you seemed overly anxious.

“Because this is an intensive program, we don’t allow students to leave until the semester is over, since for many, the behavioral issues are due to the home environment. And many even choose to stay for breaks as well.” You shot Gerard a look and he looked back with the same level of concern in his eyes. Mr. Grammar noticed it. “Now I can tell that the home environment wouldn’t be the problem in this instance, I believe I’m an excellent judge of character and you seem like perfectly lovely people. Sometimes it’s the school environment that just doesn’t work, like for Mikey here, but the rules apply equally to all the boys attending.”

“How soon can he enroll?” Gerard asked.

“Well, the semester is almost over in just a couple of weeks, and the students have two weeks of winter break. We can bring him in at the beginning of the spring term, just after the new year.”

You glanced over at Gerard again and he looked from you to Mikey before nodding. “We’ve done a lot of research and put a lot of thought into this. I think I that we will have Mikey start in January.”

“I don’t wanna go to school here, I wanna stay with my friends!” Mikey whined.

“You should have thought about that before you got into trouble,” Gerard replied sternly. “What are our next steps?”

After a thorough tour of the impeccably neat dormitories, classrooms, and grounds, where you witnessed younger boys marching from one building to the next in two perfectly straight rows, you went back and completed the paperwork to enroll Mikey.

“If they take kids of all ages, where were the older boys? We only saw younger ones,” you commented once you were safely back in the car.

“No idea, and that’s where Shawn’s son would be. That should be top priority for you Mikes,” Gerard replied.

“Got it,” he replied.

“So, we have a few weeks, what do we do in the meantime?” You asked as you headed home.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: Smiling and Alive - John Nolan and Hazy Shade of Winter - Gerard Way

When you reported back to the others that Mikey would be starting at the school just after the new year, everyone started making plans for how to spend their free time before then. Frank announced that he wanted to go back and visit his family for the holidays, and Ray, still seeking normalcy, declared he wanted to go with him. Adam had been planning on meeting up with John and a couple other friends in Florida over the new year and promptly invited you, Gerard, and Mikey along.

“Sounds like fun to me,” you said looking between Gerard and Mikey. Mikey shrugged and nodded.

“Alright, we’re in,” Gerard replied with a grin.

After spending a quiet Christmas with the Way brothers and Adam, you headed south to Florida, where John’s family had a vacation home. On New Years Eve, the group got dressed up and headed to a crowded, rowdy bar. It was fun at first, but you quickly got a headache from the noise.

“Can we go outside?” You asked Gerard, shouting over the noise of the other partygoers.

Gerard smiled down at you and nodded, taking your hand and winding through the crowd. When you made it outside you took a deep breath and felt the wind on your face. Then a realization struck.

“The ocean is close,“ you said excitedly as you grinned at Gerard and took off running down the street.

It was a few blocks before your feet hit the sand. You paused and looked back at Gerard as he jogged up behind you. Breathlessly smiling he reached for your waist, but you slipped just out of his grasp with a laugh and took off toward the water, peeling your dress over your head as you ran, tossing it behind you as you kicked off your shoes and dove into the water.

It was cold, but still felt perfect as you swam out and then floated on your back, looking up at the moon. You let the waves pull you under before you swam back up for air and looked back at Gerard sitting at the edge of the water, blonde hair almost glowing in the moonlight on the dark beach. You made your way back to the shore, shivering in your soaked undergarments.

"Feeling better?” Gerard asked with a chuckle.

“Best I’ve felt in a long time. You know I love the water,” you said as you plopped down next to him the sand.

You noticed Gerard trying to keep his gaze from lingering too long on your exposed skin, so you tilted your head to catch his eye.

“I’m so happy we’re in this together. Not like we had much say in it, fate and all, but I’m so glad either way. I love you Gerard, I can’t wait to see what the next year has in store for us.”

Gerard reached up, cupping your cheek and pulled your lips to his. His hand felt so warm against your cheek as you leaned back, pulling him on top of you in the sand. He had one arm holding him up, as the other hand ran up and down your side, goosebumps following where his fingers brushed.

You deepened the kiss, tongues moving against each other as you ran your fingers through his hair, the sensation of your nails raking against his scalp causing him to gasp lightly against your lips.

You couldn’t tell how long you spent like that on the beach, intertwined in each other’s arms, the only sound was the waves gently crashing at your feet until fireworks started going off somewhere inland.

Gerard broke the kiss looking up as the shimmering colors filled the sky. “Happy new year (YN),” he said before leaning back down to capture his lips against yours.

“Happy new year, Gerard,” you replied once you broke apart again. You involuntarily shivered, the cold night air becoming no match for the warmth Gerard’s body was providing.

“You’re freezing, come on, let’s get you inside,” he said handing you your dress. You slipped it back on and pulled your shoes back on. Gerard wrapped his arm around your shoulders, rubbing your arm as he held you tight to his side as you hurried back to John’s house, fireworks still bursting in the sky above you, bathing you both in pops of color.

You glanced up at Gerard and couldn’t help but smile. You didn’t know if you properly conveyed how happy you truly were, but you hoped he could tell. He glanced down at you and smiled before placing a quick kiss to your forehead. Everything felt so perfect, you just hoped it could stay like this forever.

~

By the time you arrived back at John’s place, you could feel the familiar tug of sleep pulling at your eyelids. Gerard let you both in with the spare key that John had left for you. You kicked off your shoes and made your way back to the room were sharing with Gerard.

Eyes barely open, you changed quickly out of your damp clothes and into your pajamas before dropping face first against the pillows. When Gerard came in from the bathroom, he couldn’t help but smile as he pulled the covers around you.

“Hope you don’t get sick from this, Sugar,” he said quietly as he unbuttoned his shirt and changed into pajama pants. He slipped into the spot next to you, but you didn’t stir. He knew that you were likely in the depths of a vision. He watched you sleeping for a few moments before turning his attention to his phone, notifying you friends that you had already turned in for the night. Suddenly he heard you gasp and saw the look of wide-eyed, terror on your face as you sat bolt upright.

“(YN), what did you see?” he asked, grabbing your arm.

You looked over at him, unable to speak for a moment until you choked out “I saw someone being murdered.”

“Do you know who it was? Who did it?”

“No! I didn’t recognize anyone or anything. All I could tell was it looked like a younger person and he was making it look like the older person had killed themselves. I don’t know what to do, Gerard!”

He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close against his chest, resting his head on top of yours. “I don’t know, Sugar, I don’t know if we can do anything. It could be anywhere. I’m so sorry you had to see it.”

You nodded, listening to his reassurances. “I just wish there was something I could do to improve so I could be of more help, so I could call the police and tell them this is happening or stop it myself. I’m just like a witness who can’t even bring justice to the victims because no one would believe me!”

“I’m so sorry that this is happening to you (YN). I wish I could take this burden off your shoulders,” Gerard replied rocking you gently against him. It broke his heart to see you like this, racked by guilt for something you never should have been forced to see. He didn’t understand why this had to happen and he would have a few choice words with whatever force or entity bestowed this gift and curse upon you if he was ever given a chance.

You and the guys arrived back at Adam’s house a few days after the new year, leaving just a day before Mikey was to begin school. As you started unloading your bags, Adam’s neighbor called over to him.

“Hey, you’ve been out of town a while, right? Did you hear the news?”

“No, what’s going on Steve?” Adam asked, walking over to his neighbor.

“Mayor’s dead! Offed himself on New Year’s Eve!”

This caught the attention of you, Gerard, and Mikey. “Wait, what?” You asked, as you all made your way over to the conversation.

“Yea, hang on,” Steve said going to his recycling bin and rummaging around before pulling out a newspaper. “Here you go.”

He handed you the paper and you felt your knees go weak when you saw the photo. It was exactly who you saw in your vision. “Shit,” you muttered.

Gerard had his hand around your waist supporting you in a second. “Is that him?”

You nodded as you handed the paper to Adam who began to read the article aloud. “And they don’t think that it’s suspicious at all?” He asked after he finished.

“Guess not. The deputy mayor announced right away that he didn’t wanna run for the office and called for a special election. It’s gonna be today.”

“What? How do they even have a candidate that fast?” Mikey asked.

Steve shrugged. “That bigwig over at the fancy school outside town threw his name in, and no one else seemed interested. I guess the whole thing is a technicality really.”

Gerard’s grip on your waist grew tighter. “It doesn’t seem right,” he said.

“That’s small-town life for ya,” Steve replied.

You made your way inside and sunk down on the sofa. “What do we do now? I can’t go to the police and tell them it was a murder; they’ll suspect us if we do. It one of those the kids from the school, it has to have been.”

“It seems like he’s trying to consolidate power,” Adam thought out loud. “If he’s mayor, he’s gonna control the police and he sure as hell isn’t gonna investigate himself.”

“It just makes what we’re doing that much more important. And you gotta keep an eye on yourself Mikey. You can’t slip up, because he obviously isn’t above killing to get his way.”

Mikey nodded solemnly. “Got it. Let’s get ready for tomorrow.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: mentions of kidnapping in this chapter
> 
> Song recommendations for this chapter: Control by Halsey and Devil by Shinedown

The next day, you and Gerard got back into your parental attire and loaded Mikey and his belongings into the car. Mikey packed his suitcase full of notebooks, envelopes and stamps to send letters back, as well as comic books and a few items of kid’s clothes that you had picked up.

You were more nervous now than at the first meeting as you walked from the car to the building you gripped Mikey’s hand tight, Gerard walking ahead of you, with Mikey’s luggage. You checked in at the office, then met with a kind older lady who dispensed to Mikey a week’s worth of uniforms. Then you found yourself sitting and waiting for Mr. Grammar again.

“I’m a grown man in a schoolboy uniform,” Mikey grumbled under his breath.

Gerard shushed him and you suppressed the nervous giggle threatening to escape you lips. However the nerves settled back in before Mr. Grammar walked in with the counselor assigned to Mikey.

“Miss Janis will take you back for your assessment now. It’s time to say goodbye to your parents,” Mr. Grammar announced to Mikey.

You crouched down and gave him a hug. “Thank you,” you whispered in his ear before planting a kiss to the top of his head.

“Stay out of trouble,” Gerard said before wrapping Mikey in a hug. You almost smiled, knowing what he really meant was ‘don’t get caught.’ Mikey nodded obediently before following the middle-aged woman into another room.

“We’ll be in contact to let you know how he is adjusting. If you have any questions, please feel free to call.”

You and Gerard each shook his hand before making your way back out to the car. You let out a long sigh as soon as the door was shut.

“Now we wait,” you said wearily.

“Now we wait,” Gerard replied.

Mikey managed to get letters out each week with his observations. It wasn’t the young boys being brainwashed, rather they were being trained to obey orders without question. The older boys, those who came into the school later, or who started to act out were the ones who seemed to be subjected to the brainwashing. In the meantime, you and the guys started asking around to gather more information from the locals about Grammar and his school. You needed to figure out what his endgame was.

A few weeks later you sat up, jolted awake by the vision first vision you had experienced in quite a while. You felt blindly in the dark for your notebook to write down what you had seen. ‘notes about transgressions and their monetary value for different families. Said old money pay more to avoid scandals, new money too dumb to know a good price’. It had been like you were looking over Grammar’s shoulder as he wrote down names and things like “gambling problem” or “serial cheater”.

The next morning you brought your notebook to breakfast to show the guys. “Its not just about control like we suspected, but extortion too.”

“Is it that simple though?” Gerard questioned.

“Why not? Power, control, money. Its small scale, but it makes sense to me,” Ray agreed. Adam nodded as well.

“Frank?” you asked. You still felt on the outs with him and could hardly stand it, having done nothing but be a supportive member of the team. He shrugged and you rolled your eyes at his non-response.

“I’ll write Mikey and see if he can get into Grammar’s office and find the notebook and any additional information,” Gerard said getting up, pressing a kiss to you head as he went to get some more coffee.

~

It was an uneventful few days as you waited to hear back from Mikey about the ledger in Grammar’s office. You decided you had enough of being cooped up with the guys and headed out on a walk to the coffee shop nearby. You smiled as you took in the early spring sunshine, glad to be outside when you saw two teenage boys walking toward you. It seemed strange they were out in the middle of the afternoon like that, and the hair on the back of your neck bristled.

They moved to walk single file as you passed on the right side of the sidewalk. As you rounded the corner, you spotted the van and put it together. Suddenly there were footsteps running up behind you and the van door burst open. Your instincts told you to run, but they were faster. You couldn’t get away before a cloth covered your mouth and nose and you felt you knees give out. Everything went black as you hit the sidewalk.

When you opened your eyes, you were in a dark room. When you lifted your head, a screen lit up in front of you. You winced away from the bright light as a headache and overwhelming nausea hit you. You struggled against the bindings at your wrists and ankles as you heard footsteps approach from behind.

“Well now Mrs. Way, it looks like we’re due for a very serious discussion,” Grammar said as he moved to stand in front of you, casting you into a shadow. “I feel that to best learn how to deal with my students, I must find out as much as I can about their parents. There’s always something they don’t mention that is relevant to my bottom line.”

He clicked a button in his hand and the projector changed to a photo you immediately recognized to be of you and Gerard at the beach in Florida on New Years, when he had long blonde hair.

He scrolled through multiple paparazzi-style photos of you running down to the water, you pulling your dress over your head, diving into the water, laying in the sand making out with Gerard.

“We assumed you were cheating on your husband and causing the disruptions at home, it happens more often than you’d think.” He watched your face intently as he said that before chuckling darkly. “Yes, this was exactly as I had come to suspect,” he said clicking the projector again. The next photo was of you and Gerard walking away from the beach, both of your faces clear as day. The nausea got worse.

“I thought this was a twin brother, and I started imagining the library we could get to cover a scandal like that,” he chortled. “But a little research found there is no marriage certificate for a (YN) and Gerard Way. There are no birth records for a Mikey Way dating back eight years. There is a brother, oh and we thought we had you here, but that Mikey is no twin of Gerard’s. That’s when I realized there was something else going on.”

You let your head hang, just trying to control how sick you felt. If only you could lie and get out of this mess by paying him off. No, that’s not what you did, you fought back against the unjust, it would only enable him. He was blackmailing people and using their own children as his foot soldiers. You swallowed hard and looked up.

“If you think you have any idea what’s going on, how much bigger this is than yourself, you’ve got another thing coming. We know what you did. We know you killed the mayor.”

Grammar’s face flashed with fear before turning dark with rage. He gave you an vicious shove, sending your chair toppling backward and you cracked your head on the floor. He stomped over to the intercom on the wall. “Get Way in here now!” He shouted into the speaker.

Everything was fuzzy, and you wanted to cry out in pain, but didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. He went behind you where you couldn’t see him again until a staticky voice came through the intercom again.

“Sir, there’s a problem.”

“What?” he barked.

“Way is gone.”

Gerard had been at the window, wondering what was taking so long for you to return from the cafe. A nervous, sick feeling had settled in, but he hoped he was just being paranoid. Just as he decided to sit down to try to relax, Mikey burst through the door.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Gerard asked jumping back up.

“They got her, they got (YN)! I saw them bringing her in, but I didn’t wanna go in there alone. I’m sorry, but we gotta hurry!” Mikey replied breathlessly.

“Sit down, catch your breath,” Ray said.

“No we gotta go, now!”

Gerard was trying to keep his head from spinning. “We need back up, from the outside. Adam, Ray, go get Frank and go get the state patrol or the county sheriff or something, but not the police, they’re under Grammar’s orders. Mikey, we’ll go get (YN) out.”

“I’ll wake up Frank,” Adam said hurrying to the bedrooms.

“How are we supposed to get the sheriff to come with us?” Ray asked.

“I’ll call and fill you in on what I found on the way, but we have to hurry,” Mikey said anxiously.

Gerard grabbed his car keys and rushed out with Mikey, Adam, Ray, and a sleepy looking Frank on their heels.

As Gerard sped toward the school his mind was racing. He was worried sick about what could be happening to you. He should have gone with you, he never should have left you alone while a mission was ongoing.

“Back there,” Mikey said as Gerard headed toward the back of the property.

“They’re on their way,” Mikey said after instructing the others where to find them. “I’m gonna go see if I can get the kids out, are you ok to go get her?”

“Yea, it’s fine, I got this,” Gerard said running toward the small building. Gerard hurried down the first set of stairs he saw before someone knocked him to the ground from behind.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Some physical violence in this chapter
> 
> Song recommendations for this chapter: Blood // Water by Grandson

Gerard opened his eyes, his wrists and ankles bound to the chair he was sitting in. As his eyes regained focus, he saw you standing in front of him with your back turned.

“(YN),” he said hoarsely. You turned to face him and immediately he knew something was wrong, the look in your eye told him that you weren’t there. “Come on Sugar, let’s get out of here,” he pleaded.

Your eyes narrowed and you strode up to him and before he could brace himself, you slapped him across the face. “You aren’t going anywhere until I get answers out of you!” you snarled.

Gerard was dazed, blinking hard and working his jaw trying to alleviate the pain. “(YN), I know this isn’t you-”

“You have been manipulating me for months! You’re using my powers for your own gain and it’s over. I’m done with being used and lied to! You tell me you love me, but you’re just profiting off me!” You bellowed at him. “Now,” you paused and ran a fingernail along his jawline to his chin, tilting his face up to look up at you. “Tell me who is funding you taking out Grammar?”

“(YN), you know I love you, I would never do anything to manipulate you! We aren’t doing this for money, you know that!” Gerard pleaded.

You reached in your back pocket and flipped open the knife you had concealed and held it to his throat. “I fucking dare you to lie to me again,” you growled. Gerard just closed his eyes and tried to think of how he could get through to you, or maybe change into something so he could get unbound, but his adrenaline was too high. When he opened his eyes, you had moved behind him, and he couldn’t see what you were doing.

Suddenly he heard the sound of bodies hitting the ground as you let out a groan. He looked over and saw your knife sliding across the floor, Frank becoming visible, crawling off you, and scrambling after it.

You tried to scramble after him, grabbing for his ankles but he was too quick. He grabbed the knife and then lunged back at you. Suddenly he was straddling you with the knife to your throat.

“Frank! Don’t hurt her!” Gerard shouted. “She’s been brainwashed!”

“Bullshit!” Frank spat.

“Fuck you!” You shouted back at Frank, the cold metal pressing harder against your throat, but you didn’t care.

“Look in her eyes!” Gerard pleaded.

“Fucking slit my throat, you coward,” you growled. “You said I’m a killer, so why don’t you fucking make it right?”

This gave him pause as he searched your face, and his expression softened. “Shit,” he murmured. “How do well help her?”

“I don’t know, just cut me free!” Gerard shouted at Frank.

Frank shoved off you and rushed over to free one of Gerard’s wrists. You stumbled to your feet and launched yourself at Frank as he cut at the bindings. Then you heard Gerard cry out in pain. Your head whipped around and you felt like you were finally aware of the fog over your head.

Then you noticed the black eye forming under Gerard’s eye, blood dripping from his arm where you caused the knife to gouge into him. He looked up at you as Frank cut at his ankles and he held his wounded arm.

“(YN), I see you in there, come back,” Gerard pleaded. “Come on Sugar, can’t you still feel it? Can’t you feel how much I love you?”

You took steps toward him and the fog lifted further. “Gerard,” you murmured as began to feel sick. You knew what you had done to him, the one person you had promised to love and trust, and you let someone manipulate you into hurting him. You felt your knees give out as Gerard grabbed you before you hit the ground.

“We got him!” You heard Mikey say among other voices you didn’t recognize as your vision went black.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song recommendations for this chapter: Superposition (Reflection) - Young The Giant and This is Gospel (Piano Version) - Panic! At The Disco. It’s VERY important you listen to these versions of the songs, I have a very specific mood that I’m going for here!

When you came to, you were laying in the backseat of Gerard’s car and you could feel you were moving.

“Hey (YN), you ok?” Gerard asked as you sat up. He reached back and you shied away from his outstretched hand.

“No,” you grumbled. You felt sick, absolutely wracked with guilt.

“They got all the kids out, they’re gonna be ok,” Mikey said.

“Good,” was all you could muster as you let your head slide against the cool glass of the window.

“Sugar, it’s ok,” Gerard said softly. You just closed your eyes and shook your head. It wasn’t ok. It was never going to be ok.

When you arrived back at Adam’s house, you walked silently through the house, not acknowledging Ray saying he was glad you were safe, or Adam thanking you for helping the boys at the school. You drifted out the back door, finally settled on a patio chair. You let the tears of guilt fall down your cheeks silently. You were the monster that Frank warned Gerard about. You let your guard down for a second and you could have killed the only person you loved. You’d never forgive yourself.

As the sun started to set, Gerard came outside. “Sugar come inside. I’m ok, I don’t blame you,” he said kneeling down in front of you. You just lowered your gaze.

“I ruined everything,” you said quietly.

“No, no you didn’t. I understand what happened. It happened to everyone in this town. He didn’t know why we were there, that’s why he went after you like that.”

You shook your head. “I should have seen it coming.” Then you paused, realizing you had. “Shit, that day in the rain back in November, I almost saw it but I woke up too soon.”

“The day I told you I love you,” Gerard said remembering the day vividly, you looked up at him through bloodshot eyes. “I still do.”

“I’m so sorry,” you sobbed. Gerard stood up and wrapped his arms around you as you cried. When you sobs died down, he pressed a kiss to your head.

“Are you ready to come inside?”

“No,” you murmured. He nodded and went inside, then he came back out shortly after with a blanket and wrapped it around you.

When the door closed behind him, you felt the tears welling up again. You didn’t deserve him. You didn’t deserve that love. You knew what you had to do.

~

You let yourself drift in and out of sleep, the cool evening air enveloping you until you were sure that the coast would be clear. You crept inside and down into the basement. You packed your bag up as silently as possible and then ordered an car to pick you up. You watched Gerard sleeping, the wounds you inflicted stark against his pale skin. You tore a page out of your notebook, the one he gave you the day after you met. The notebook that was from his grandmother. She told you that you were fated together, but she had it wrong.

_I can’t forgive myself for hurting you. If you love me, let me go. I love you and I’m so sorry._

You held a shaking hand over your mouth and dropped the note next to him before grabbing your things and hurrying upstairs to the waiting car. When you arrived at the bus terminal, you bought a ticket for the first bus heading north to New Jersey.

A few hours later you were in line waiting to board the bus, a sense of relief that no one had woken up, found you were gone, and come after you was starting to settle in. Maybe you were really going to go in peace. Maybe they didn’t forgive you like they said and were glad you were gone. Maybe Gerard didn’t have any problem with it because how could he love you after what you did to him. The negative thoughts continued to swamp your mind as you shuffled toward the front of the line.

“Wait! Wait wait wait!” A voice you didn’t recognize cut through your thoughts. “(YN)! Wait!”

You turned and saw a man with dark brown hair that was short on one side pushing past the line of disgruntled people waiting to board the bus. You didn’t recognize him at all.

“Do I know you?” You asked stepping out of line.

“No, but I know you, and I need your help. You and your friends.”

“I don’t have any friends,” you replied curtly.

“(YN), I’m a seer too,” he said quietly. “My name is Ryan. Someone has taken my friend Dallon and I need help.”


End file.
